I swear i;m not really that lazy.

well i feel very inproductive right now
for starters i woke up at noon, and didnt really do anything until about 1. then i decided i would check my youtube subscriptions, and i found a new youtube show from take 180 called i heart vampires. it is actually really intriguing and i wish that they actually made the focus book in the story a real novel, it would probably be the new twilight.... actually now that i think about it, its a bit like twilight, the first chapters were leaked onto the internet of the fifth book and then the auhors vows to never get the rest published and everyone is like argh!. but mostly it's a lot diffrent. i suppose. anyways i recomend you watch it. currently they are on season 2 episode 7. so now is the time to catch up.
I just finsihed that, and its around 5 o'clock.
Also while i've been watching this, i've been listening to the news in chile, and hawaii and how there is tsunami warings all across the western coast. and eastern coast of asia. I cannot believe that its 8.8.... thats insane. Our world really is falling apart around us. Though it really isnt our fault that the plaques are moving around, its the fact that all these deseases, all these problems, they're all happening so fast, so much lately. It feels as if we just got over Katrina, then there was the earthquake in haiti, and now, perhaps all of these coasts.... i mean chili was hit so bad, and even with all these warnings for tsunami's there will be casualties, there always are. Esepecially soemthing this big.

One thing i'm shocked about however is the fact that we have 11 gold medals this year and 22 medals total, and it keeps getting more and more, they estimate a minimum of 25 medals by the end of today. Canada, this is our year. apparently we've already beaten our record. which is super awesome.

So ifeel particularly lazy.... Once i finish this post, i'm gonna call my grandmother, and see if everything's going okay between her and steve, then I'll finish my chapter questions on to kill a mockingbird. After that I'll probably have diner, it is almost ready, then... either work on my alice in wonderland poster OR continue writing, i think i want to get 3 to 4 chapters on the move today. so by tomorrow i can probably get like 5 or 6.... i'll still be behind by 3 or more chapters, but thats a comparitivly small number, and i do have to think realisticly or i will never reach my goals.... i have 78 days left and though i;m behind by a sugnificant amount i think i can still reach my goals if i set my mind towards it.
I can be a remarkably stubborn person when i try. :D
From the wonders of my mind,
GothGirl xox

PS yesturday my mother, my sister, olivia, and i went to mcDonalds for diner, and my mom, and i started talking to this lady while andrea and olivia were playing in the jungle gym. I was wearing a baggy sweater over a stripped tank top, and every time my sleve would slip down mom would like dive over to put it back up.... what is it with adults and shoulders? We used to joke about that in elementary school, but it's still going on... its getting to a point where i am actually curious... its not even as if we are showing abything off, its skin... should we cover our faces aswell? Its a shoulder.. a section of bone covered in skin... why is it such a big deal, its not even as if i was wearing a strapless or a tube top... it was a tank top. i wear a lot less during the summer. If any of you know what the deal is please do explain.

my grama called the cops on my uncle! HIGH FIVE

sorry i haven't posted in a while, i've just been so busy with school I'm fighting with justin again... well actually its the same extended fight, i mean we can barely have a conversation anymore and i just don't think he cars anymore. So anyways, lots going on, we started reading to kill a mockingbird in class, interesting stuff, umm i have like 3 tests a week now, we just started a new art project ( its basically like a painted alice in wonderland poste *the one with johny depp* and cut up into pieces and each person gets a diffrent piece to paint, then we put them together and get the final project.) Also I'm starting to actually like gym. Its not like before with the guys, as long as you try everyone is treated equally, if you're having a hard time poeple help you out instead of mock you, i'm having a blast with my team mates no matter who they are, we are learning strategizing. You know i even contemplated taking gym again next year, or some other year... then again it's very difficult, and im only a month into the course... it'll probably get harder as it goes along.

Besides those notes there isn't much to say. I've been reading Belgarath by david eddings... very complicated... i sent in my transfer forms..... WAIT did i tell you all about my transfer?! I guess i didn't!

Well we recieved our course selection sheets and it turns out our school has shit for options... so seeing how the only thing keeping me here was the fact that they offer art in french ( which is no longer an option) I decided that i'd attempt to transfer this year. After much agrivation with my parents i convinced them and sent in my transfer sheet 2 days before the dealine. Usually i like to do things early, but this i didn't have much notice with.

Also my grandmother got my uncle arrested. Okay well she just sold the family cottage and steve ( my uncle) got all mad and her, so he started threatening her, and yelling at her, and basically all around freaking out. Finally today he took the kids ( his kids) and hauled them up to the cottage and said that he wouldn't leave until the police came for him, of course thinking my grama was too inocent to call the cops on him... thing about my grandmother that he didn't particularly realize.... she's been through shit in her life, lived through it, moved downtown ottawa, and raised him and my mother with some 20 adopted kids. A forty year old son having a temper tantrum was nothing. so she called the cops. High five grama!
:D

Until next time,
GothGirl xox

from math class

well its math class.... thrilling per usual. I'm currently extremely bored easy as it was to study for my exams, i now find myself stressed over the answers. which we are recieving in like... oh 5 minutes.
Also i completed my first beep test last period. im proud to say i got a 4.9 sadly that is only like a C... or so. Oh well i beat my goal which was a 3. :D i didnt realize how pathetic that was until once i actually DID the beep test. however even at 4.9 i felt like my inerds were being liquified in a blender and shoved back in. pleasant image ain't it? So if it wasnt bad enough that i was in gym and my legs already hurt from spin the day previous i was then forced to do a beep test which should be outlawed due to inhumanity laws or something...CHILDRENS RIGHTS!!!! for godess' sake! Funny thing is though it is just stop running afterwards it turns out you have the forceful need to cough and curl up into a fetal position. i mean EVERYONE was coughing. why is it that running induces coughing fits... that would be a question to athina that im sure she will undoubtly not know.
I sadly still havent written anymore of styks... i just find myself unable to force myself to get up and write happy i love you scenes between sybil and james when i feel like shit and am sad about justin cause i miss him... turns out he isnt able to come to my valentines day dance and i will only be able to see him on the next friday... a PD day. Ill try but i think i might just need to give myself a break ubntil things are looking slightly brighter... Oh and i might just change james' name to Lucien, because that sounds soooo much better.
Besides that not too much is going on. I've started semester two and my favourite class is english no surprise there.
I got my haircut....
AND OH!!!!! i finally after much convincing watched the pathetic looking movie of the notebook.... well that supposed pathetic movie turned out to be my #1 fav movie and book... and that is saying a lot if you know how much i read and guessing you are a follower or know me you know first hand that this is by far a grand accomplishement. sadly i cannot props the author cause hes dead. :(
I will write an official review in a little while but this is math. and i dont have my notes :D
"note queen strikes again" -gennifer

I wish banana with her crush on jesse im sure justin can convince him but the only wuestion is will it work out or wither and die... not trying to be morbid but those are the facts. <3
also i hope i prove my horoscope wrong because it was not good news for me. this week my horoscope said: you will be single by valentines day, but stay in there things might not be too bad. Oh yea like that's reasuring.... so im not longer going to be dating justin but ill wont be too depressed because its for my own good.... i know ive threatened to leave justin and ive felt really sad cause i miss him or he was being a pompus twit... i still could never ACTUALLY do it.

gtg get my scores.
Gothgirl xox

failed...

I failed my french summative.... failed. oh my god. this cannot be happening to me! ive never failed ANYTHING before! i worked sooo hard on this too!!! i worked and worked and omg.... i was soo confident this was going to get an A. my presentation was spotless, my writing wasnt my best but it wasnt bad either. the ideas were supurb and it was an amazing finished product... AND I FAILED!!!how the HELL does that work!! the only reason i got marks off was because mine was one of the last ones to be handed in cause mrs friken cheung gave me the second last slot time. she even admitted that she easyer marks those handed in first. so i mean its prejudice really. i was given that time slot and now im getting punished for it... i cannot believe this. its going to bring my mark down insanely. !!! i know its JUST grade 9 whatever the hell that means but i care about school and my marks and it feels like i just got punched in the face by my french teacher. im sorry but if french FRANCE is your third language you should not be teaching french QUEBECOIS!!! UGH

so now im upset and stressed out even more. i cant even use my anger with something useful. all i have left to do now is study... and i cant study harshly it just doesnt work! so now im putting all my anger and scorn into this post! GRRRR i worked sooo hard on this project on these projects and now i got my first one back and i failed... is that fair?! now im worried about my geo one and my science one. i was confident about those two aswell but now... im not sure. JEESH i have exam time!

:S

i just realized how much i missed justin. We've seen each other only on the bus for the past 3 weeks. i havent really hung out with him since dec 17 when we went out for his birthday.and even that was with a group of people. i cant remember the last time we just did something us two. i miss the way he holds me, and our odd conversations. i miss not having to worry about anything else because he was there. I miss knowing he was always there for me. I suppose it wouldnt be so bad as long as we talked. we havent video chatted since he left. he's barely ever online and when he is online its for like 20 minutes. we barely talk any more and it seems like we never have time for each other anymore. This coming friday is our 10 month anniversary and how much do you want to bet we won't end up seeing each other. its a horrible feeling. like a part of me is missing. i don't like feeling like this.

i wonder if justin misses me at all. probably not cause hes not even trying. hes always busy and its just like he doesnt care. you know? i just cant wait until we can see each other again. i miss him so much.
GG

it is probably a good thing though because we are both stressed out and pulled to our limits with exams and summatives. we'd probably only fight anyway. thats why i hope we can see each other on the 29th cause everything will be done so we can just relaxe.

new respect

I came to a new respect with my aunt today. for a while, i honestly thought she was stuck up and cold and cared for few people. today i realized that was not the case and that she in fact delt with the same thing i had to. the only diffrences being, she never knew her father loved her, and shes been dealing with it for a long time. also i dont think shes an old soul so she doesnt have the calm tendensies that i do. Anyway. After 60 years of dealing with that im not sure she really is cold, just steeled from the world so she wont get hurt. i understand that and sympathize with it. actually i dont really need to. i know. So now when i look at her, i see myself, years from now. its a very real possibility. and im happy i now understand fully the situation. i like getting both sides of an argument before forming an opinion.

GODDESS!!!!! grrr.....

okay its fourth period and i think i finally have enough time to make a little post. not one of my famously long ranting ones but enough to catch you up on my current affairs. I'd love to tell youthat everythings amazin and that im super happy and great and writing a million friken pages a day and that my book was coming along nicely... sadly that is sooo beyond not the case.

so basically ill start from the main and go into the deep heady world of the extremly complicated. Well as you know in january every single teenager in high school has to take exams and do summativve projects. What my school didn't plan for was timing. Usually the summatives were a feew weeks before exams so that way we wouldnt be as stressed out. so instead now i have my exams and my summatives on the same day... basically i can say its pretty crazy. I just finished my french summative and did my music exam. My science summative is due thursday and my geography, tomorrow. For french i had to create a movie about a ffrench play. science i have to create a board game (which isnt that bad) and in geo, i have to literally make, and withstand my village. Thrilling isnt it. so anyways here i am extremely stressed out. also on top of that my exams, music today tomorrow, and tuesday. my science exam tuesday, my geo thursday and my french wednesday.

btw my friend pickles says hi. she is sitting beside me reading over my shoulder.... lol she just commented on the fact that she cant be reading oveer my shoulder if shes beside me... sadly she may be right.

back on track: Im stressed im slightly crazy im totally freaking out and fighting with my dad and mom 24/ 7 is sooo not helping anything. worst of all, every single one of my teachers are like you shouldn't get stressed, just take it in steps.... yea well they dont have 3 summatives to do and 4 exams to study for!!! grr.

Actually pardon my faute. the worst thing is. justin is in the same mental state im in... none. so basically summing up my worst problem i havent really had a conversation that wasnt about school with justin since....... december 17 which was the last time i saw him before he left for arizona. shit that sucks. plus... that was the last day i was with him too... and that was wiiith people. i cant even remember when we saw each other alone. gr. so i miss him a lot and well we cant do anything this coming weekend cause im devoting my entire brain power to studying because i dont have much time this week. then finally on the 29th we're going to see each other... sadly that means i have to wait for the 29th ( which is btw our 10 month aniversary yays)

after all this im not much of a person and has absolutely no excess brain matter. When im not studying or working, im thinking about studying and working. and when im not thinking about studying or working im dreaming about it... which is just as bad. plainly saying i havent had any time to write or have a alife for the oast 2 weeks. this is soo beyond insane. im behind in my book by like 5 chapters and i cant even seem to care because im too worried about everything else going on. only 116 more days and still 17 more chapters. good thing being next semester will be a breeze so i dont even have to worry about catching up. i can jsut do 2 or 3 chapters a week for the first little while and be back on in no time. i mean seriously art english gym math what a snap! goddess i just said snap... there must be something wring with me...

until another time
GothGirl

PS im supposed to be writing the descriptions of my village right now... but its in french and im not in the mood. DAMNIT!

Hey srry I haven't posted in a while I promise to catch you up once I have more time. Ps srry this is all a title I'm writing on my iPod GG )0(

Happy New Year

It is 2010 my friends.
New years resolutions:
1. to finish my book
2. to not lie
3. find a third resolution

News, and no news.
there is so much i have to say and yet i don't really have anything to say.
I send my regrets to my friend Erin whos great grandmother just passed away on her birthday.
Also i say hooray for new clothes. AND im getting a new haircut soon. Hopefully justin won't hate it even if it is short.
I am now on chapter 12 and continuesly writing.
Hm... what else. Oh, even though there is only 3 more day of vacation until summatives and exams, i have a lot to do.
Jan 1:
drawing my new haircut to see the fit on me
homework
writing

Jan 2:
Writing
Family dinner ( which justin can't come to, im still mad about that)
programming my new ipod touch

Jan 3:
Getting my new haircut
Homework
Studying
Writing.

By the way, like 3 minutes before new years do you notice that all the anouncers are like "you better have the person you love close by because like you know, its a tradition to kiss them at midnight. :D" Like fuck you, make every friken person on the planet that can't be wil that person or don't have that person feel bad. Like all those girls at home with their husbands in the war. Like they don't want to be with them at midnight, but they can't. Or me and justin cause we're on;y 14, our parents don't really let us stay out till midnight. Like god.... bugs me. Poor single people, not only do they have valentines day stab them in the back but they have the new years anouncers too...

GothGirl xox
PS i should write comedy i mean lately everything i say sounds like stnad up and its funny too.
:D blue berry vitamins, orange art, psyciatrists, new years anouncers, emotional reading. ( you know when you cry or laugh about something you're reading and the people around you are like... what?), and Leah and her phone.... hmm maybe ill have to post them on here along with my theories.

week 7 update.

Finished until chapter 10... fell behind 2 chapters. will be catching up. go to JMKempster.blogspot.com for more details.**

GothGirlxox

** i will probably just stop posting about my book on this site soon. so save the link. this blog will mostly be about my personal life
PS with that note i realized something tragic. Justin and I probably won't last. And as much as i love him and it pains me to say... it might be soon... I do love him, and i know he loves me, and im not going to say that its just me... no its totally his fault. I need someone that is sweet and caring and considerate... and anyone who knows justin can tell you immediatly that just isn't him. I need someone who acts like im a goddess (or relitivly). Im gonna try to give jusitn more of a chance because i know that he can be sweet and adoring... sometimes he can be the nicest guy in the world. the only problem is that lately i havent seen that guy. and i know that the moment im back in his arms im going to forget because thats the effect we have when we're together. The only question now is does justin care more about "The Man" and being an uber tough non caring guy, or me. At some point he's going to need to pick because i refuse to date a jerk. It'll kill me, but there are just some lines that i will not cross.
God I hope... i just want to know. i need a sign....